Weird Things Parents Do On Date Night

I love date night or date day whatever it happens to be.  I’m with my husband. There’s no kids whining or bickering (at least not our kids) and we can enjoy each others company. But it seems that every time we go out we have developed some habits. Our social time management is completely lost. Our etiquette isn’t so great and I bet people are staring. Here’s what I noticed:

We Eat Fast- Everytime we go out we tend to eat really fast. It’s not intentional it’s just what we are used to doing since we have kids and when we eat at home we actually want to eat it when it’s warm instead of getting up constantly to get more milk, ketchup, pepper…their wants are endless.  A parents night out is supposed to be an escape from this but habits are hard to break.

We Chug Drinks- Like the food situation this isn’t intentional. At home my drinks last longer than 10 minutes. But when we are out we end up drinking while we are eating and talking and before you know it you feel pretty good so you order another.

We Take Selfies- We both have our hair brushed (well I have my hair brushed) and are looking good. No stained up oily clothes for him and I’m wearing lip gloss and earrings. You can bet your ass I’m photographing this moment and posting it for everyone to see.

Dinner Is Done By 7pm- We have consumed our food and at least 2-3 drinks and it’s only 7.  We have spent what felt like hours at dinner when it has really only been 1 hour. Going home right now isn’t an option. The kids aren’t even in bed yet.

We Feel Old- Our dinner is demolished before most people even leave the house for a night out. We’re tipsy off of our few drinks. We’re giddy to be at a restaurant. I look around and feel frumpy. Drinks with names that I can’t pronounce are ordered. And there we sit. We’re the creepy old people at the bar. Talk of the next destination is discussed.

We Make Random Purchases- Since dinner is done so early and we’ve discussed heading to different bar and we are walking, we stop at all the shops along the way (we couldn’t do this with the kids) and buy stuff we don’t need. My elephant collection may be a result of this.

We Get Home By 10pm and Go To Bed- Our dates are always fun. But paired with having two kids, one of which I home school, makes us tired. And even if we have the energy for an epic night out of drinking and dancing, the kids still wake up before the sun rises the next day. And they are not always understanding when it comes to exhaustion and hangovers.

Date nights sure aren’t what they used to be. Maybe we should work on our table manners, and our social skills. But who am I changing for? If I’m honest with myself, this is just where I’m at in life right now. Maybe this is why the parenting books don’t mention this phenomenon. Perhaps this isn’t an etiquette issue after all.  Sure these habits are strange, but if I look around, I’m in the company of fellow parent date nighters, pre-kid date nights and post-kid date nights, each with their own set of endearing and not-so-endearing habits. Instead of being critical of these habits, I’ll work on enjoying them. Since before I know it, I’ll be the old lady who takes her dentures out at the table.

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