THINGS I DON’T GIVE A “BLEEP” ABOUT ANYMORE

Sometimes I just don’t have time to care or I’ve had a long day (especially lately) and I have run out of energy to care what happens. I’m busy with this move, doctors appointments, school and the rest of our lives as well. There just never seems to be enough time. So, sometimes I just have to care less. Get rid of the things that don’t matter so I can save the ones that do. Some things I am going to “try” not to care about anymore-

When I make the spaghetti that my kids just HAD TO HAVE and then only eat 4 bites before declaring they’re full. At the present moment in my life, I do not have time to waste worrying about what they eat or making food they aren’t going to eat. So I just don’t care anymore.

When the kids ask for a snack 30 seconds after dinner. Ya, whatever.

I see the photos of your adorable kids smiling at me from my news feed but I suspect that two seconds earlier one child had his finger up his nose, the other child tried to bite his sibling, and you were muttering through gritted teeth something along the lines of “for the love of god, can’t we have just one fucking family photo?!” before the camera went clickclickclick. Immediately thereafter, one child burst into tears, another one pulled off his pants and peed on the floor, and you raced out of the room to pour a glass of wine before editing the shit out of that photo with an Instragram filter. But, don’t worry, even though I know this, I’ll still like the hell out of your photos. #rulesofmomclub

I generally try to give people the benefit of the doubt, assume good intentions, and let shit go. But sometimes you just gotta say, Fuck this shit. Life is short and ain’t nobody got time for bullshit.

Yes, I know that I “should” limit screen time and TV time and video game time but I also know that sometimes I need to give all the shoulds the middle finger and do what is necessary for my sanity and that means bingeing on screen time.

There is a difference between being nice and being kind. Sometimes they overlap but sometimes in order to be kind you have to say screw “nice” and let your inner bitch take over—because, let’s face it, bitches get shit done.

Whether it’s fashion, music, or lingo, I don’t really keep up on trends. In fact, I recently had to Google “bae,” and I still don’t understand what it means. Fortunately, I know what IDGAF means.

Sometimes you just need a night on the town, away from your kids, while you shake your ass to loud club music.

Parenting is a petri dish of opinions. And you know what they say about opinions, right? Well, if opinions are like assholes and everyone has one, opinions on the internet are like assholes after a trip to Taco Bell—everyone has one and they hurt like a mo-fo!

Extraordinary takes time and effort, like 10,000 hours of time and effort. Let’s be honest, I have far too much going on to spend 10,000 hours on one any given thing. I’d much rather my efforts go toward raising good and kind people even if that means they are just meh at all that other stuff. Because you know what? Good and kind is pretty extraordinary all on its own.

I used to think that grown-ups had it all figured out. That they had all the answers. That they had their shit together. Then I realized that no one has all the answers and most people are just pretending to have their shit together. We’re all just winging it.

Be thankful for what you have and the time you are given. Don’t waste it on things or people you can’t control.

Happy Thursday!

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