I love watching my kids doing the activities that they love doing. What I dislike is hearing other parents negative remarks towards their kids while doing such activities.
Pushing your kids is one thing but nagging at them to the point of them crying and then wanting to give up is another. They are already more than likely trying to do their best to impress you. Now you are raising your voice at them. Embarrassing them in front of their peers. Something that is definitely not necessary. If they aren’t picking it up as quickly as others it is not something to point out in front of everyone or be yelling at them, trying to correct during their lesson either.
I know my kids don’t pick up everything right away and sometimes not even the second time around. I most certainly am not standing on the side lines yelling at them on how to do it correctly or pay attention. I know that will only make them pissed off and not want to pay attention. In my case even get so mad as to cry and yell back at me. (which has happened even without me saying anything to them)
I not only see this during their extra activities but just when parents talk to their other kids on side lines. The words they use when they talk to their kids. “I don’t care what you say, You better listen to me, That’s what you get.” Instead of saying something much more simple like “How unfortunate or What a bummer or When you’re ready to listen you can get up.”
I’m so happy and fortunate to have read Parenting with Love and Logic. It has helped me as a parent, as a spouse, as a friend, as a person! I have learned and am continuously learning how to better myself with my kids. How to talk to them and be there for them in better ways. Not saying No but saying the alternative. Not saying sucks to be you or I don’t care or because I said so or yelling from the sidelines. Learning the appropriate times to speak to them about the crucial things that I know will embarrass them. You know what that is as a parent.
I have posted about this book before and here I am posting about it again. Seeing parents yelling at their kids during karate yesterday to the point of crying reminded me of it yet again.
So here is the link for the book if anyone is interested. Parenting with Love and Logic. And here is the link for the website which is loaded with information for parents, teachers, anyone! Love and Logic
I hope something that has helped me can help you too!