Confessions

As I was searching the internet and looking at some of my favorite blog sites, I had come across this awesome board. A Confessional. You see those “memes” with them all the time. But these were real live people confessing to random real shit that I could relate to. I had to share. (All remaining anonymous)

“Holy Shit! Who knew mother hood could turn you into a total psycho! I drink every other day and just want to be left the fuck alone!”

“There’s no school today so my kid is eating cold hotdogs for breakfast!”

“I threw my kid’s phone out the window after she dared me too. My husband thinks he’s going to get her a new one but she’s 11 and frankly a little beotch.”

“My youngest is 5 and I hate bath time more than ever.”

“I screamed at my kids for screaming at each other.”

“My kid told me his step mom made him eat a hot dog with mustard on it. He hates mustard. I want to fill a bath tub with mustard and drown her in it.”

“My new friend asked me how I stay so positive. I told her I take Zoloft. But I didn’t tell her it’s because when the kids were little I wanted to die. I’m so happy I’m not there anymore.”

“I keep a few pictures of my kids when they are sick on my phone. That way when I want to back out of something I can send them a picture of my sick kids that aren’t really sick.”

“I can’t help my 9 yr old with their math. I’m so dumb.”

“My son is just like me- Difficult and disagreeable. I have another one now, I hope she isn’t.”

“Pretty sure the whole neighborhood just heard me yelling at my 18 month old to go to sleep. Yep, mother of the year right here.”

“Got stopped in the grocery store and told how well behaved my kids were. I just wanted to scream NO THEY’RE FUCKING NOT. I THREATENED THEM BEFORE WE CAME IN HERE.”

I can relate to more than half of these. Seriously. The well behaved store thing…I always have “the talk” before we enter any store/restaurant anywhere. You might not realize it until someone else says it or you might be too embarrassed to say them but this is real shit. I have some confessions myself…

On the weekends and non school days, I don’t care what my kids eat all day long. Oreos for breakfast. Whatever they find for lunch. I do however make them dinner and they should be happy I do!

This week my kids only showered once!

Delylah kept calling me a liar yesterday over and over and over. I snapped and told her if she calls me a liar again she’s getting soap in her mouth. Ya! WTF

If I have 1 drink I’m going to have another. After that my kids know it’s fend for yourself night.

Levi knows my look…He doesn’t care though and always seems to have some sarcastic bullshit to say. He gets it from me so it’s hard to be mad.

I always have diarrhea of the mouth. So if you don’t want to hear something that probably needs to be said to you…don’t talk to me.

Do you have a confession?

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