Yesterday I walk in the house and Levi is holding onto his side as if in pain so I ask what is wrong. Immediately, he comes back with his story and that no one cares. (something happened at school) We begin talking. He begins crying and I end up apologizing. Apologizing because he thought he was in trouble. That’s why he started crying during his story and talking in a rude manner. Very Rude. I never want my kids to feel like they can’t tell me something. This is not the only time I ever apologize.
After I’ve had a hard day and lose my shit over something stupid. I apologize.
After they are fighting and I can’t get them to listen to me, I have to yell. I then apologize. I don’t like yelling and I tell them not to yell all the time.
When I forget to pack them something or do something I told them I would do, I apologize.
I don’t apologize with “I’m sorry if….” I apologize with “I’m sorry that…” I’m sorry if implies that it might have happened that way or maybe I hurt your feelings. I’m sorry that implies that you know what happened and you are sorry for it. There is a difference and kids know it. You don’t say “I’m sorry if I bumped into you.” You know you did. Or “I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings.” They are crying so obviously they are. There is NEVER a time for “I’m sorry if.” It is always “I’m sorry that.” ALWAYS!
We are always asking or making our kids apologize for things. Hitting their siblings. Taking a toy out of some kids hands. Saying mean things. What about when we aren’t very nice because our boss is a jerk? Or maybe we’ve been fighting with our spouse and don’t want to deal with the kids at the moment so we have a short fuse. Maybe we’ve been outside in the heat all day and it’s getting to us so frustration is running high. Do we apologize for our actions and our words? Are we teaching our kids that they have to apologize for these things but we never do!?
I for one find myself apologizing all the time. I feel better after. I’m also a talker so I make sure we talk about what happened, why it happened and why I am sorry. I am teaching my kids to do the same. It’s hard for kids to apologize. They get really, really mad! They don’t want to say sorry after they tackle their sister for throwing their X-BOX remote! But, it’s only a remote and you only have one sister. At least in our case. Teaching your kids to apologize and mean it, will take them far. They will love you for teaching them that even adults have hard moments.
So, I’m wondering…How many of you apologize to your kids? For anything???
PLEASE VOTE BY CLICKING THE PINK ICON BELOW AND CLICKING AGAIN WHEN IT RE DIRECTS YOU. THANK YOU SO MUCH!